Going Crazy

Sometimes I think that I am going crazy. I get these major anxiety attacks that make me feel like I need to get away and it always happens when I can't get away. I have been planning a vacation for Pat and I since April for this weekend, and my sister Pam was going to come and watch the kids and we were going to have this wonderful time without kids. Well as it happens she couldn't come and my Mom wanted us to go down there to California and she would watch them but with gas being so much and then hotel we thought that would be quite an expensive weekend, so we didn't go. Also we are going through some stressful changes with our business so its not a good time to leave. So no vacation to Cali. Well we then were invited to go camping with some buddies of ours but we had no one to watch the kids. So all these exciting things were being presented but nothing was working out, and I have been dying for a break so now I have major anxiety about wanting to go somewhere. I know, I know, it sounds mean wanting to leave my kids and going crazy because I can't but really that is how I am, I really need my time away to keep me sane. So I have a few friends that I play basketball with who are going boating on Saturday, and they invited me and I will probably go, but deep down I want to run away(thats the anxiety speaking).